


The Good Customer

by UnproblematicMe



Category: Good Omens (TV), Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
Genre: Amused Crowley (Good Omens), Clueless Aziraphale (Good Omens), First Kiss, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-01
Updated: 2021-02-01
Packaged: 2021-03-12 22:34:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 847
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29143071
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/UnproblematicMe/pseuds/UnproblematicMe
Summary: One of Aziraphale's regular customers has begun to act strange and - frankly - annoying. Good thing Crowley is able and willing to help.
Relationships: Aziraphale/Crowley (Good Omens)
Comments: 26
Kudos: 188
Collections: Love and Lust Through the Ages Volume II





	The Good Customer

**Author's Note:**

> The second story I wrote for "Love and Lust through the ages", Volume II. I hope you like it and check out the other work from the zine as well. :)

“Oh dear, there he is again,” Aziraphale sighs.

“Who?” Crowley follows Aziraphale’s gaze and looks out of the window.

“The gentleman across the street,” Aziraphale points at a tall dark haired man on the other side of the road who is just buying a newspaper. “Christopher Millberg. Even though he insists I call him ‘Chris’.”

“Does he now?” Crowley chuckles. “Customer?”

“A good one in fact. Never interested in my stock, just wants me to find specific books for him, doesn’t barter, just accepts my price. Old money, you know.”

“I see,” Crowley says, confused. “Then what is the problem?”

“Lately he behaves very strange.”

“How so?”

“Well, he comes in not for business but ‘just to chat’ and then he prattles on forever,” Aziraphale groans.

“Oh?”

“Yes! And he doesn’t even want to talk about books. He asks me where I buy my aftershave since he finds it ‘enticing’. I told him twice now where I get it from. Just like I told him who tailors my ‘extremely well fitted’ trousers. But he mentions it again and again.”

“Erm, angel…”

“And he needs to get his eyesight tested,” Aziraphale says. “He constantly brushes over my shoulder or chest because he thinks there is lint or dust. On _my_ clothes! Ridiculous. Or he finds a loose lash he has to thumb away - in _my_ face! I’m an angel, my lashes don’t fall out!”

Crowley sighs, exasperated. But Aziraphale does not notice. He is caught up in his rant about Chris.

“When he finally gets enough of this nonsense, he frets how much of my time he has wasted,” he continues. “I would appreciate this self-awareness of course, but it does not last long. Because he wants to make up for it by taking me out to dinner. Like that would not waste even _more_ of my time.”

Now Crowley can no longer help it. He grins broadly and starts laughing. Aziraphale of course does not appreciate that. Reproachfully he looks at Crowley and pouts.

“Really, Crowley,” he says. “I know as a demon you revel in misery, but we’re friends and this situation really causes me great distress.”

Crowley lifts his hands in a placating gesture.

“Okay, okay, sorry,” he chuckles. “I need to ask: Do you want to go to dinner with this guy?”

“Crowley, I spent the last five minutes telling you how annoying he is.”

“I’ll take that as a no.” Crowley now removes his glasses, focuses on Aziraphale’s eyes and a dark expression spreads across his face. “I can help you with this.”

“Oh really?” Aziraphale beams at him, brows raised and eyes wide. “Would you?”

“Of course, but…,” Crowley pauses dramatically, “…it might cost you this ‘good customer’.”

“You won’t hurt him, right?” Aziraphale asks.

“Nope, I won’t do anything to him,” Crowley promises.

Aziraphale contemplates this for a second. But then he looks out of the window and sees Christopher cross the street, aiming for the bookshop. Again he has that expression that does not look like business but like socializing. Aziraphale shudders.

“In this case, please help me,” Aziraphale begs.

A predatory grin spreads across Crowley’s face.

“As you wish,” he says.

When the bell above the shop door rings, Crowley grabs Aziraphale’s shoulders and pulls him close. He tilts his head and his mouth finds the angel’s. He kisses him sensually, in a slow tender rhythm, but his attempts to part Aziraphale’s lips are unmistakable.

When Aziraphale complies, accompanied by a sweet little sigh, Crowley takes his chance to slip in. Simultaneously he lets his hands wander away from Aziraphale’s shoulders to put them possessively on the angel’s lovely hips. Crowley uses his grip to get their bodies even closer together and Aziraphale whimpers helplessly. He lies pliantly in the demon’s arms, letting him dominate the kiss. With long languid strokes of his tongue Crowley teases and explores. Aziraphale only shyly responds, but if anything this only adds to Crowley’s excitement. He growls and pushes Aziraphale against a bookshelf. His right hand slips under Aziraphale’s waistcoat and he longs to just rip the interfering piece of fabric away.

The bell rings again as the shop door falls shut. Aziraphale and Crowley are ripped out of their haze. Both blink, a little confused, and turn to the exit. They watch Christopher Millberg, face cherry red, hurry along the window and out of sight.

Crowley smirks at the flushed angel in front of him.

“There he goes,” he says smugly.

“There he goes,” Aziraphale repeats.

He wrings his hands and nervously bites his kiss swollen lip.

“You know,” he speaks after a moment, blushing even deeper. “Thinking about it… I do have a lot of annoying customers…”

Chuckling Crowley closes the gap between them again. With a snap of his fingers the shop’s door locks itself and the sign turns to “closed”.

“Don’t worry, angel,” he purrs. “I’ll take care of them, but first…,” he crowds Aziraphale against the bookshelf, “I’d like to claim my reward for this one.”

“Rightly so,” Aziraphale whispers before his lips are sealed again.

The End


End file.
